29 August

when I come to their garden

I steal in through the gate







Comments

  1. Brian Miller29 August 2013 at 22:15

    ha. sneaky you. intriguing...def a bare bones verse...i wonder what you started with?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Victoria29 August 2013 at 23:21

    Reading this makes me want to write something tight like that. Very skillfully done.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Susan29 August 2013 at 23:30

    I think you could cutt this down to one short line ...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. aspiritofsimplicity30 August 2013 at 06:33

      I think, that for these purposes, you may be right. "I steal in through the gate" does say an awful lot.

      Delete
  4. Claudia29 August 2013 at 23:32

    now that is edited down to its essence, yet says enough for us to get the mind going..smiles

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous30 August 2013 at 06:38

    Very concise and your view words create an aura for the story behind it--a moment.>KB

    ReplyDelete
  6. Laurie Kolp30 August 2013 at 09:51

    Love it!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Kathryn Dyche30 August 2013 at 15:33

    He, he, he . . . have to wonder about the original.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous30 August 2013 at 16:52

    The imagination runs wild and faster than our feet! Wonderful dear!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous30 August 2013 at 17:44

    now that is an edit... hmmm, I wonder what will happen

    ReplyDelete
  10. Margaret3 September 2013 at 09:01

    I think the first line is important as it sets the scene far more than just the second line alone. What you are "stealing into" is important for "mood". The brevity here is unique and fun.

    ReplyDelete

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Deep peace of the flowing air to you.
Deep peace of the quiet earth to you.
Deep peace of the shining stars to you.
Deep peace of the gentle night to you.
Moon and stars pour their healing light on you

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